When I set out in 2011 I was dimly aware that, just like the period after a performance…..the “performance blues” …. I would be coming back. Coming back to more of the inner journey.
A book came my way recently. ” Boarding School Survivors”
It was a harrowing read and has released a flood of memories. With it, art that takes my breath away.
In the moments after painting from such a deeply painful place, I have found myself with Beethoven beside me on the piano stool. …. sonatas I have not yet played, offering comfort and even musical impishness to bring me back to the light. He is indeed a beloved, tender friend and wraps himself around me, more so now than ever.
Yes, intimacy at a great distance is a safe bet.
At school my precious gift of music and the solace and privacy of the practice rooms literally kept me afloat.
There are many more of these paintings to come.
Some of you said it would be interesting to read about the return…what happens next. This burning impulse to paint is what is happening now. I don’t know what is next, but I am hopeful that breaking silence will be valuable in the greater scheme of things.
The journey continues to take me by surprise.
The paintings so far are
“Seven years?” ( first impressions )
“Bed of tears” ( dormitory life )